#41: land of the free, but is anyone feeling brave??

how are we all feeling after the debate? anyone else feeling existential?!

hi hi hi sisters ♡ good evening, so sorry this is coming out later than usual today. for my internship this summer we had our first day of the institute where the incoming 9th graders were with us, so we had to teach them today and woof it was exhausting, once again my respect for teachers all around grows every day.

hope everyone had a great month of june! maybe you went to a pride parade, I hope you did. I celebrated the end of june by watching the first couple of episodes of the new season of the bear (wow what a sentence) but damn that show is so good — even though it can probably give me an aneurysm at any moment, I love it !!

now that summer is here, idk about you guys, but I want to make sure my skin feels nice and smooth (lol this is sounding like an ad…) BUT I really do want to recommend the trader joes brazil nut body scrub. it makes my skin feel so soft and it smells soooo lovely and its very affordable!!

movies: somehow I watched 6 movies this week hehe

started off watching paris is burning, its a documentary on the trans and drag community in NYC in the 80’s, its on HBO Max, highly recommend. went to the movies and saw kinds of kindness, its the newest yorgos movie, and its weird as HELL, but I low key really liked it. also saw ghostlight in theaters, it was about a dad going through a hard time with his family and personal issues and he joins a local community theater group, and he learns to grieve his emotions through theater, LOVED IT. saw a quiet place: day one and also LOVED it, I really liked the first two movies, but this one was really beautiful because it showed how lovely humanity can be, highly recommend. for movie church we watched latter days, its wow where do I even begin, but its about a mormon missionary who is being seduced by his neighbor. thats all i’ll say, but it was hilarious and heart warming and touching and rough to watch (hits on how the church is hard for queer members)

lastly, I watched a simple favor, I love blake lively so much.

podcasts: really liked this episode that talks about deep fakes and such

music: ingrid michaelson has a new album coming out, and so does ashe

(ladies what are we at now?? already has come out: billie eilish, taylor swift, sabrina carpenter, maya hawke, charlie xcx, lizzy mcalpine, kacey musgraves, gracie abrams, dua lipa, beyonce, maggie rogers. then in the future: that woman, haim, lana del ray, ice spice, ingrid michaelson, ashe, suki waterhouse and probably so many more I haven’t heard of yet or have forgotten. like 20 new albums this year that have been announced or released already from kick ass women?? LUCKY US)

in my mind: so I saw a tiktok talking about how at trader joe’s some companies will sell their products, but use it under a trader joe’s name to make you think that you are like consuming trader joe’s produced products. for example: the green juice or the mango juice, are actually naked juices (which makes my heart so happy because they are half the price of any naked drink in the city)

so I found an article that goes through the different products and what brands they actually are. very interesting!! who knows how accurate it is, but still fun to think about! its like how there will be ghost kitchens through food delivery apps, where a company used the brick and mortar store of another food place, but they create their own business to sell via food delivery apps. you can read more about it from the NYT, heres a free article!

if any of you are like me, after this week’s debate and supreme court rulings, you are feeling depleted and disgruntled and scared for the future of the united states. OH and to add to the shit show, this supreme court ruling that just came out TODAY saying that the president is immune to prosecution for official acts that happen during a presidency, but not unofficial ones, anyone else confused?!? and then we have the overturn of chevron (which great because I learned that in one of my classes this last year but that doesnt matter anymore for the bar… COOL)

anyways, a lot is changing in the united states these days and a whole lot more might change with a new administration possibly. and it can all just feel so overwhelming, not even including the situation of the world, I cant help but feel HOPELESS and so stressed about bringing children into this world at some point. but then bjørn reminds me that the world has truly been not the best place for most people for centuries and decades and years before me.

and he said:

“I mean yes but objectively the world has always been a terrible place for most people throughout history. I don’t think that’s any reason to stop being hopeful for the future, and to deny our children their right to life. I just think that’s a doomer mindset that doesn’t acknowledge by so many metrics that’s life has never been easier or better for most people things don’t always have to get worse and accepting that we’re doomed to that future is maybe the worst thing we all collectively could do…”

so if it wasn’t climate change, it was famine; if it wasn’t inflation it was a world war; if it wasn’t reproductive rights, it was voting rights. which dont get me wrong, it gives me great comfort to be reminded that we have come quite a long way, and the world is a better place for so so so many people, BUT i can’t help but be stressed. because its not better for EVERYONE. which is somewhat of a crazy expectation to have, but I can’t help but have it…. and maybe that is why I care so much about voting and world issues, because deep in my soul I feel like the world and the united states CAN be a great place for everyone.

I know i’m marginalized, but the constitution (not all of it), does give me hope… “we hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed, by their Creator, with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.” most memorials in DC give me hope: the lincoln memorial and the gettysburg address; the thomas jefferson memorial; the MLK memorial.

I believe that we can get there, but at the moment we are a nation divided, and I dont know how much longer we can stand…

tiktok: theater kids in the wild; obsessed with lupita; I was feeling quite existential this week… this video didn’t quite help

pinterest: everything is lore; sometimes I need to tell myself this; this concept gives me so much swelling in my heart I can’t explain it

instagram: these film photos from kinds of kindness, obsessed; oh this poem; prime video is cracking me up

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between the bear and teaching kids for a month, my respect for those in the food industry and education just goes through the roof, like its at an all time high. could not be me full time, which is why I want to do as much research as I can before the election so I make an educated decision because the department of education needs to stay in tact. okayyyy, well that took a turn I wasnt expecting 100% but oh well thats what you get on a monday evening!!